Life is …whatever you believe to be true, is. Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you are correct.
Today we often share wisdom that leads to assumptions about what is true and real, Our assumptions are the result of “lessons” that we learned from our parents which were reinforced throughout school. watching movies, listening to modern music, reading and any other media we expose ourselves to.
Could these lessons have a bias or a set of assumptions behind them that we have yet to challenge?
Have you ever looked at someone and even for a single instant made a judgement about them because of their appearance, dress or colour of their skin? Yet, when you took the time and made the effort to see beyond that initial thought you discovered someone you wanted to know more about.
What are you thoughts about love? How has it been coloured by external influences? Which do you listen to – your heart, your head or your genitals?
What is the purpose of your work? Why do you work with the way you do? Why do you spend your money that you worked for the way you do?
Why has technology become so necessary for doing business today? How many of the features do you use on your phone or computer? And honestly when was the last time you had a conversation with someone without using technology while having that conversation?
Please look at the assumptions we make when someone makes a snide comment that we overhear. How often do we hear only part of the conversation? Or worse we mishear what is being said because of how we are thinking?
And because of that, we make a judgement or form an opinion that later may prove ominous.
I constantly run scenarios in my head about upcoming situations. These in turn create assumptions for what is going to happen. I am prepared to act should something happen. And guess what…my assumptions based on those scenarios are usually WRONG!
Assumptions are based on past experiences and are a way of protecting us. They become a shell that defends us from hurt.
What happened yesterday, last year or with a different person, may not happen today or with the person you are dealing with. The assumption you have made colour your thinking.
Reducing your Assumptions
Can you really reduce your assumptions?
When you are aware of this moment and take the time to be in the moment, it is possible to examine your assumptions. You take the time to look at the situation now. And what is true now is true.
What is happening; what we believe it means make up our assumptions in this moment of time.
The next time you feel yourself reacting to a situation, a person, a comment or anything instead of allowing the reaction to occur, STOP.
Take a deep breathe.
Evaluate the situation as it is and decide what you want to happen next.
Do you really want to get even, get angry, get physical (good or bad)?
Ask yourself, what can I learn and do with this moment that will help me be happier? Remember that anger, angst and strong emotions affect our health. And also remember when we hold an emotion, that emotion affects the choice of actions we make..
While eliminating assumptions is not possible, being aware of what we assume does assist us to make different decisions.
Let’s stop reacting based on assumptions and begin to act based on:
- Accepting others as they are.
- Acknowledging that we are all different
- Appreciating the fact that you are alive and able to feel the different emotions
- Think through your assumptions.
- Act to achieve a situation where everyone feels heard, supported and happy.
If Assumptions challenge you, challenge your assumptions